Two Pieces of Financial Advice

If I could give the world two pieces of financial advice that you should never deviate from and always follow, it would be the following:

1) ALWAYS GET A RECEIPT:  One of my students in class today was upset because she said she paid her tuition with cash and they are saying she didn't pay.  Whether she did or didn't, she said she didn't get or ask for a receipt.   Ooooooh, people...  unless you are paying with a check (and it wouldn't hurt even then), you should ALWAYS ask for a receipt, in fact, demand one.  In this world, it's unfortunate, but you really can't trust anyone when it comes to money.  And you also never know when the receipt will come in handy.  People forget they got paid, people lie about getting paid.  And if someone refuses to give a receipt, that's shady and they don't deserve your money.  Even if you pay in money order and have the money order receipt, those can get rather tricky to track and you paid for them with cash, so it's best to get a receipt for those as well.

2) NEVER ACCEPT PERSONAL CHECKS:  No way, no how!  I don't care if it's your best friend, don't accept a personal check.  Hard times happen.  Good people don't intend for checks to bounce.  Things just happen and whether it was an oversight, your friend didn't get their paycheck when they were supposed to, things happen.  I don't know too many people that are so well off they can just leave checks lying around for weeks and not cash them.  We all need to get paid, we all rely on getting paid, so when a check we accept doesn't clear, a snowball effect happens and pretty soon your house is being foreclosed upon and your car is being repo'd.   Accepting business checks tends to be a little safer because most businesses are on good enough terms with their banks that if there is an overdraft, the bank will cover it.  And unless you hear rumors your employer is going out of business, payroll checks are generally the safest. 

Tip:  An addendum to this would be that if you do find yourself receiving a check you're wary of, only accept a local one and take it immediately to the bank it was DRAWN ON and get cash for it.  That way you are not liable for fees through your bank if it bounces, it is all put back on the account of the person who wrote the check.

Anyway, I don't often have words of wisdom, but these are a couple that I think everyone should learn!!!!

What a Difference a Day Makes!!

Despite the whole bipolar thing, I see myself as a glass full kind of gal.  I totally abhor suicide because people have to realize that life CAN get better, you just have to work at it.  Of course, I know that not every bad thing in life is specifically that person's fault... believe me, I KNOW.  I always say that the bad things that have happened to me in life are because of other people.  That probably sounds like I don't take the blame for anything, believe me I do!  If I don't have money for gas and I don't work, duh, it's my fault I don't have money for gas!  But if I don't have money for gas because Jen Schirm of Iowa City didn't pay me the $150 she owed me for babysitting... well, then I blame Jen Schirm.  (Of course I can be partially to blame for trusting someone who couldn't be trusted.)

So, rewind to yesterday.  Not to get into details, but when we moved into our apartment, the lady that manages the property we moved into said that she wouldn't cash our deposit until close to Sept. 9th because that's when we'd be caught up from moving.  She even talked us into moving sooner than we had planned because she kept insisting the check wouldn't get cashed until the 9th.  Well, guess what.  Yesterday was soooo not the 9th and the check got deducted from my bank account, which immediately ruined my day.  Once again, I suppose I can take blame for trusting someone... am I beginning to see a pattern here?  Wow, I just had an epiphany... bad things happen to me when I trust people.  Aha!  Now I know why I say you can never trust anyone.

Fast forward back to today.  A deposit came in sooner than I had anticipated, which covered the check that was cashed yesterday!  That immediately put me in a much better mood.  And I sat there and realized, you know, I have two awesome kids who are with me 98% of the time, I have a fantastic boyfriend who loves me endlessly, I have friends that occasionally talk to me, I just got a part in a play, which is one of my favorite things to do AND, I love my job!!!  So dang it, I tell myself, I need to start looking more at the positives than the negatives.  Sure, David tells me that all you need is love... well, I don't know that living in a cardboard box with my kids eating rats is really going to make me happy, but I appreciate his sentiment.

So for today, it's a good day and I'm loving life!!!

My Name is Hammy, and I'm a Hypocrite

You know how things bother you?  You can't say that nothing bothers you.  We're all human and whether we smile and act like nothing is wrong, put our faith in God that things will get better, or brush it under the rug, there will always be that instant when your brain tells you, "Hey!  I don't like this feeling."

Well, I've had to become more self aware of myself in the past year than I'd care to.  I'm tired of myself!  But, in order to become the people we want to be, we must take a hard look at our flaws and realize that although we don't want to change, sometimes we need to.

So this leads me into my realization that I am totally a hypocrite!  I used to pride myself in not being a jealous person.  But then I realized that it wasn't so much I wasn't jealous, it was just that when I was younger, I didn't invest much in the guys I was dating, then in my longest relationship, it was more that I had no reason to be jealous.  But then when I did, I chalked it up to mental issues.  I poo poo'd the idea that I was a jealous person.  Well, fast forward to today and I will be honest that I am a jealous person!  Sure, there were the guys that I didn't care about enough to get jealous, but then when there is one, I realize that the thought of him being interested or alone with another chick makes me wanna rip his AND her heads off, wrap them in trashbags full of gasoline, hang them from a flag pole and shoot flaming arrows at them.

But what makes me a hypocrite is that I don't see why it's not okay for me to talk to guys, why it's not okay for me to hang out alone with guys.  It's okay for me to text my exes, but if a guy I'm with even brings up a girl's name that he even kissed while drunk, I'm ready to claw some faces!  And I'll be honest, I'm normally big on keeping my feelings buried down deep because I don't like feeling vulnerable.  But then the bipolar side of me occasionally kicks in and I flip out like a vegetarian at the slaughter house.

I don't know why I can't convince myself not to feel this way.  I know I'm not the hottest looking lady out there, but it's not that I feel threatened.  I guess it's more the idea that a guy I'm interested in would even give a second thought to another girl.  And no, I'm not THAT full of myself!  I know my poo stinks as much as everyone else's does.  I just can't force myself to stop.  All I know is that it hurts.  I get physical pains in my chests at the thought of someone who cared/cares about me caring about someone else, whether I want to be with them or not...

Anyway, I've said too much.

Hidden Agendas and Weebles That Wobble, But Won't Fall Down

I'd like to think of myself as a butterfly that was in a cocoon for about 8 or 9 years after spending the beginning of my life lamely eating leaves and being blown around by tires rumbling down the highway.  Thankfully I squeezed through the treads in order to find my way to a comfortable spot that I could lie in wait of the fateful emergence that would let me fly out in the world, on my own.  Now, only downside to this analogy: butterflies are gorgeous.  I'm more of a moth.  But a shiny moth, nonetheless!

Now, onto the hidden agendas.  In this metamorphosis,  I have come to find that the best way to survive in this world is not to trust ANYONE.  I mean A-N-Y-O-N-E.  The world is inherently a selfish place and therefore we are all inherently... selfish.  I will admit, I am selfish, most would say to a fault.  I also consider myself to be very giving... some might say to a fault.  And I'm sure you're reading this thinking, "wow, what a bitter outlook on life!" 

BUT NO!!!  Therein lies the crazy part!  I love life right now!  Sure, I get a kink in my armor here or there and a rain cloud may follow me from one end of the block to the other, but really, doesn't life rock??  I'm healthy, my kids are awesome and healthy.  The world is at my fingertips and I'm ready to explore it!  So, I have decided that really, no one can be trusted.  I will admit, I can't be trusted.  Sure, I'm honest about most things, but remember- I'm selfish.  I have found that whether it is something as little as a white lie or one of those "lying by omission" situations, EVERYONE lies.  But it's okay.  I'm okay with it.  It's frustrating when two people are saying the other is lying, but I'll roll, I'll handle.

We are all in it for ourselves.  Whether we are doing something to make money, to score, to get to the pearly gates, to snag that job or steal that friend (or even that friend's boyfriend), let's for once be honest in saying that we are selfish... and sometimes it's okay.  We lie... and it's not always the end of the world.  But with my grain of salt deeply embedded into the lining of my skirt pocket, I shall wander the paved streets and the smooshy mud next to CVS Pharmacy and know that everything I'm told, everything I hear may have a little bit of untruth to it.

And to that I say, bring it!!!  I can handle your untruths and keep walking with my head up.