Adventures in Babysitting

Due to a "lack of support" (if you will) and the dwindling school days left before summer and impending inability to substitute teach until the end of August, I have been scrambling to come up with an income to pay my share of my bills, pay my car payment and all the other goodies that come from being an independent single mother of two.

So, I have three talents that I believe I am best at (that are legal) and those are: acting, interacting with animals and faking my way through enjoying the company of small children (which I guess goes along with acting.)  Oh, I guess I like to think I am good at writing, but the grad advisor at Western Illinois University would probably beg to differ.

Anyway, I am constantly looking for drop-in babysitting for my kids, occasional babysitting if you will.  You know, they always say that if there's a niche out there that needs to be filled, it will be a lucrative and worthwhile venture to fill it yourself.  Well, since moving to the second largest city in Iowa (move over Los Angeles, you've been p'owned) I have been annoyed with the lack of options for childcare.  Part time is pretty much unheard of.  Transportation to and from school is even less of a possibility unless you wanna pay a thousand bucks a month, which is not in a substitute teacher's budget.  And what about those occasional times when you need to go to your psychiatric appointment or visit your favorite ob/gyn?  Neither of these are kid-friendly situations and living 100 miles from my parents/most reliable babysitters makes for a hard time for this mom.  I have occasional reliability in friends, but that is a rarity. 

So, on my quest, I have discovered that other parents have this quest as well: affordable, occasional babysitters.  Add this to my recent obsession with craigslist and VOILA! - I have a supplemental income.  I currently have 9 kids in my roladex of children I watch, with more inquiries each day and occasional interviews.  They range in ages 1-9.  (Thankfully the majority are 5 and under because the older they get, the sassier and less afraid of my dirty glares they get.)  Whether it's 3 days a week while a parent works 9 hours, a day here and there for 2-4 hours, before and after school or overnight on the weekend, you name it, I make myself available.  My biggest day was getting up at 6 am, having 5 kids by 8, 6 kids until 4, a two hour break and then two kids overnight from 6pm until 9am the next day.

And in case you are wondering, no I am absolutely not getting rich from this venture... can I get an Amen from my fellow babysitters?  Just like being a stay at home moms, in-home daycare providers, teachers and babysitters are underpaid and under-appreciated. And in case you are hoping to turn me into the state for being an "unlicensed daycare provider," suck it, cause I already checked and what I am doing does not constitute being a daycare provider... (na na na boo boo).

I'll admit, some kids annoy me far worse than others, but in general, the worst behaved out of the group is my son, so it makes the other kids much more tolerable.  And I will be honest and admit that when one of them tells me they love me, my heart melts a little... (but if you tell anyone about this, I will kill you!)  And I can never pass up a hug.  I'm working on getting over my fear of snot and boogers and wiping noses  Plus, who needs a day off?  That's what death is for, right?  And I'm pretty sure other than my own kids, I have Memorial Day free from hitting, biting, kicking and pinching over the fact that someone else had a toy first... which is when the jekkyl side of me wants to just set the freaking toy on fire...

As I'm sure you all care immensely, I will keep you posted on how long my nerves can last with this venture... and if you don't hear from me in five days, assume I have been duct taped to a chair and please alert the local authorities...

What is a bad daycare?

My kids started going to "Hobbit Hole Daycare" (alias) in July of 2008.  My son was 6 months and my daughter was 2 years 7 months.  In the time that we've been there I've complained a great deal, but finally did some researching and found a daycare that sounds great!  Today was the kids' last day at Hobbit Hole.  I did not register them for the fall (50 bucks to hold a spot), and did not tell them we found a new daycare because I did not want there to be hard feelings.  Well, none of the people there said goodbye to my kids today and I was given a bill for the whole month of May when they will have only been there 2 days.

Here are some reasons I did not like said daycare:

1) Most of the employees don't seem to like kids.  They get paid minimum wage and are not treated the best, nor do they treat the kids the best.  I know I can't stand being around my own kids 24/7, let alone someone else's, but why not hire people to work at a daycare that actually LIKE kids?

2)  My son has cried every single day I dropped him off except maybe 3 days- out of 2 years!!!  I LOVE the last teacher he had, but she was moved to a different class recently.  In the time my son has been in the toddler room, he's had about 6 different teachers!  I liked one.

3) My daughter was terrified of naptime because apparently some of the workers were covering the kids' heads with blankets and not letting them be uncovered.

4) My son was constantly being bitten by some nameless child.

5) Everytime I pick my kids up, they are head to toe covered in dirt.

6) A couple weeks ago I showed up and my son had a black eye and no one knew it wasn't there when I dropped him off.

7)  I have picked my son up twice and instantly smelled he had pooped and when I changed him it was totally dry and caked to his tush.

8) All the employees are on a different page and don't seem to communicate well.  My son is lactose intolerant and I don't know how many times I'd see them giving him milk and when I'd point it out, they'd say no one told them.

Okay, that's enough examples.  They were clearly more interested in making money than pleasing parents or having happy kids.  Oh, and I forgot to mention you are expected to pay a month in advance.  I don't believe in paying for services I haven't received and if my kid is sick, I still have to pay (which I know most daycares do.)  Although I appreciated that they let me pay at the end of the month.

So this new place I found sounds fantastic!  I toured twice, each time with one of the kids and my husband came the second time.  Their 2 year olds group looked like they were having a great time and they get to watch NickJr before naptime and in the afternoon- just like at my house!  They had recliners because the workers were actually allowed to hold the kids.  They had potty trained almost all the kids.

My kids start at the new daycare Tuesday.  I'm really excited to know how they like it and guess what- they charge hourly and you pay at the end of the month for the exact hours you used.  I will keep you posted on how it goes, but so far they seem great!  My daughter will be in afternoon preschool in the fall, but I always worry about poor L, because he's such a mama's boy!

To Nap or Not to Nap?

I wanted to share this chart that I have referred to for years whenever I wonder what doctors recommend for nap/sleep amounts in children. I have had several issues with my kids' daycare because my daughter abhors naptime there. They have 2 hours of naptime each day and every child has to lie down for those 2 hours. I understand the workers deserve breaks, but as a parent, I don't want my child to be forced to do something I don't believe in... anyway, here is the chart I refer to. Are you surprised by any of the amounts? Do you agree/disagree?

Separation Anxiety

I know that when kids are young, they go through stages of separation anxiety... but is that supposed to happen to the parents too?!

As I've mentioned before (in the random blogs where I actually get into that whole mommy thing) my son is a TOTAL mama's boy! It's insane. Well, they're transitioning him from the infant room to the toddler room at daycare and I hate it. In the infant room, he gets coddled and he adores the woman. It literally took NINE MONTHS for him to not cry when I dropped him off there. He was getting to the point where he was excited to go. Well, he's 17 months old and they move them up anywhere from 16-18 months. In the toddler room, the woman is not very friendly and clearly hates her job. When I take L in the room, he clings to me for dear life and does not want me to leave. If I try to leave he cries hysterically. He even does that cry where he doesn't breathe because he's crying so hard and his face starts turning purple.

What's a mom to do?! My kids only go to daycare two days a week and my daughter LOVES it. But I just feel such horrendous guilt when I have to leave L there. I know he plays and has fun after I leave (he does the same thing when I leave him with my parents) but it's just the thought that he's so upset that I'm going. Plus, today the only other kids in his group were rowdy, obnoxious heathens and this one little girl kept picking her nose and I about threw up!

And yes, I've cried... so far twice. And are the daycare ladies sympathetic? NOOOO. They just keep saying, "he has to get used to the toddler room." I want to face punch them repeatedly. It just breaks my heart and I immediately think, "is what I have to do today THAT important?"

Does anyone else know what this feels like? I'm sure some of you go through this when you don't get to see ME, but I'm talking about parent/child, lol.