New Year, New Blog- sorta

As I said in my last post, mom blogs are dead and are becoming obsolete.  I enjoy maintaining a social media presence and at times need to use my blog for PR posts, so I have decided to revamp my "identity" in keeping with my own life and what interests me.  Plus, I do enjoy being able to occasionally blog as an outlet, although I don't generally have something mind-blowing to say.  I started Mom on the Random in November 2008 with just this blog and a Twitter account.  I now use Pinterest, Twitter, Instagram, YouTube, Google+ and Facebook for my online persona.  I am now changing them all to "A Borderline Mom."  For those of you who may be new to reading my blog, I have been in treatment of various capacities since 1999ish.  I have a primary diagnosis of borderline personality disorder and a secondary diagnosis of bipolar disorder, along with mild PTSD.

I think that in an effort to relate to others like myself and to let other moms know that sometimes the reality of the word "mom" is waaaaaaay different than the fantasy, this change is necessary.  I appreciate those of you who have stuck with me for any number of days, months, or years.

As I said, I will occasionally have PR-related posts, such as reviews, etc. because getting free stuff is almost as awesome as finding a bargain at Goodwill- and I'm a thrifty lady!  Plus, I have four kids and live on a college adjunct's wages and my husband is a correctional officer- so it's not like I'm made of money!

Thanks again for visiting and hopefully you can find something that interests you on one of my social media accounts.  You can find me as @hamsterkitten on Twitter, Pinterest, Instagram and YouTube and as A Borderline Mom on Google+ and Facebook.

Here's to a new year and new beginnings!!

Call me Bitter Betty but...

I want to post a Facebook message that I sent to a "friend" on May 26, 2014.  She never responded, yet we were still "friends."  Then when I moved away, which she knew was happening, I never heard from her.  I was bitter about that, so I unfriended her.  Since then, I've wondered if she needed someone to talk to and I felt bad and tried to friend her back... but she wouldn't add me.  I think this is something that will always bug me until I get some form of closure.  Maybe she doesn't like being around responsible adult friends.

Here is the copy/paste of the Facebook post (with names omitted):

I don't want you to read this in an animosity driven way, because that is not my intent. I have had this on my chest for years and if I don't ever tell you it will lead me to more years of regret.

I know you won't respond to this and that's okay. I just needed to say it.

It hurts me... HURTS ME to see you post pictures of you and all of your "friends" hanging out and yet you are never interested in doing anything with me.

Out of all the times you left **** after we met, I was always there to help you! I found you apartments, talked a landlord into letting you move in without a deposit, moved you twice, including once by myself!! I didn't have two nickels to rub together one of the times and yet I bought you cleaning supplies and some food for your kids. I was so good to you and them, yet now you couldn't give a shit less about me. I don't know at what point you decided I sucked at life, but I am a good person and I was soooo good to you and expected nothing in return. When I left **** I neither asked for your help or received it and I'm okay with that.

What gets me is that ONE time did I stop talking to you because of **** and it was because you stopped at the house to confront him with me in the car and he called me a piece of shit and tried to smash your window. I couldn't be around him after that and you went back to him, so I had to step back, but I was there for you again the next time you left.

And I don't know your friends well enough to even say anything as they've all been nice to me. I know ****** told me she quit being your friend in high school when you dropped out.

I just don't understand. I wish you would just express it to me that you don't want to be my friend. I'm a great mom, a great friend and it just blows my mind that we were so close and then nothing. I miss seeing your kids and being a happy, positive influence in their lives.

So, take this how you will. I'm not mad in the least and I do understand if you don't respond. I just wanted to express the hurt I've felt for a long time now.

Happy Memorial Day to you and yours!

The Pee in Post Partum (TMI Alert!) #parenting

I debated writing this post because it's a bit TMI, but I figured it's something other moms can empathize with and it's just a nice heads up for the moms-to-be out there.

I don't recall having this problem after my first two children are born.  Sure, when you're pregnant you have to worry about peeing your pants because you've got an 8lb baby pushing on your bladder.  But what about when that baby has been born and is about to get its driver's license??

Well, none of my kids are quite there yet, but I'm sure I'll have the same issue by the time they do get to be that age. 

Since my last two children were born only 18 months apart, I couldn't say for sure which one pushed my bladder over the edge.  But I've developed an all-too familiar problem that some moms have the pleasure of dealing with once their children have exited the womb and their bodies have started returning to somewhat normal.  Sometimes when I sneeze, I pee a little.  Yep, there's your TMI.  My most recent bout was a hellacious cold I just recovered from.  I would occasionally go through a coughing fit or let out a big sneeze and if I didn't cross my legs fast enough... I snuck upstairs in hopes no one would notice.

If you have this problem and haven't figured it out yet- cross your legs when you sneeze or cough!  Like I said, I never had this problem until after babies #3 and #4, so I know not all moms go through with this.  And I know there's a scientific explanation, that some day I will google, but that day is not today, therefore you will remain uninformed until you google it yourself.

There you have it!  So to those who may see me out and about and watch me cough or sneeze, pay no attention to me crossing my legs as I do so and especially don't think twice about it if I get a panicked look on my face and run for the bathroom.

Moms, can I get an Amen??