I don't proofread my posts before I publish them... cause I keep my thoughts au naturale.

Sunday, February 13, 2011

Why Valentine's Day Sometimes Really Does End in Bloodshed

To those who might find themselves assuming, some of these examples come from others, not just my own personal experiences:

Men are a strange beast.  Women are just a big jumble of emotional mess.  Women love Valentine's Day if they are with someone new, loathe Valentine's Day if they are with no one and resent Valentine's Day when they find themselves in a bitter point of life where they refuse to jump off the Titanic despite the fact it is clearly a sinking ship.

Men loathe Valentine's Day because they have to spend money... and lots of it.  If they only spend a little, they will look like cheapskates.  However, if they spend a bundle, it's never good enough.  Because all women want what they see in movies with rosepetal lined pathways and limos and hotel rooms with giant bathtubs and turn down service and chocolate covered strawberries.  Anything less is just a failed attempt at romance in their eyes.  And let's not get into the fact that 1 out of 5 marriage proposals happens on Valentine's Day.  And men, be prepared!  If you have been with a woman more than 8 months, she is secretly wondering about it.  Even though it might be the last thing on your mind, trust me, she is thinking it's a definite possibility.  And once a year has passed and countless Valentine's Days go buy without that bling bling ring, each Valentine's Day will mark another let down in her eyes.  No matter what you do, if there is not a ring, a little part of her soul dies.

Now what are my thoughts on Valentine's Day?  Well, I  have some people pondering this very thing.  Sure, I may seem like that whole, "I am woman, hear me roar" kind of thing, but let's face it- I AM a chick.  I'm a girlie girl in the worst possible way when it comes to romance, but apparently not when it comes to what I consider to be annoying gestures.

Honestly, I would be happy with an anonymously sent bouquet of flowers (white roses if you're interested).  Anonymous because I don't have to wonder about the intentions of the sender.  I don't have to wonder if they were sent as a meaningful gesture, if they were sent in hopes I'd think more highly of someone than I probably should or if they were sent merely from some obligatory ritualistic thought of what women want.

If you are someone that takes your phone with you into the shower because you don't want me to know who you text or who is texting you, then don't send me flowers.  If you are someone that gets angry because I spend too much time on my computer (which really isn't true) or because I'm addicted to my blackberry, don't send me flowers.  If you constantly talk to me about the rack on a chick at the bar BEFORE I comment on her rack, don't send me flowers.  If you eat lamb, veal or deer on a regular basis, don't send me flowers.  If you hunt, don't even acknowledge my existence.  But if you are someone who actually gives half a shit about my thoughts when I actually feel like sharing them with you and you don't fall under any of these categories, go ahead... even one rose would suffice!  I can be sappy when I want to be.  But don't ever sing songs to me in public and expect me to fake my way through not vomiting... cause I may be a sucker for romance, but I draw the line at public humiliation.

Now, if you are a woman who is with a man that cheats on you, you should expect nothing.  Because really, you're stupid.  If you choose to stay with someone that chooses not to hold you in their highest esteem shame on you.  But if you are only biding your time with them until someone better comes along, whatevs, just don't expect romance on Valentine's Day cause it's a sham.

And what should guys get for Valentine's Day?  Nothing.  Yeah, you heard me, nothing.  Everyone knows, but isn't willing to admit that Valentine's Day is actually Chick's Day.  No guy gives a crap and no girl gives good gifts.  All a guy really cares about on Valentine's Day is if their will be coitus involved.  Seriously.  Don't give him a card- not even a 99 cent one.

And what am I expecting this Valentine's Day?  Nothing.  Do I care?  I'll pretend I don't, but gestures do make the chick buried deep down inside me smile a bit.  You will know by my sour or sweet tweets around 10pm tomorrow night how that goes.

I'm definitely curious to see how real people wanna be in their comments on this...

Happy Valentine's Day!!!

Thursday, February 10, 2011

Mickey Mouse Clubhouse: Minnie's Masquerade

After the reaction my son had the first time he saw Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, I have become a loyal fan! Therefore, any DVD that comes out is a must have!

If you're unfamiliar with Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, it's one of the staples on Playhouse Disney and is geared towards toddlers and preschoolers. Both my kids love it. I think it's very educational. Kids learn letters, numbers, colors, vocabulary, but don't realize it because the show is so fun!

"Parents and their preschoolers are invited to join in the ultimate masquerade party with Minnie, Mickey and pals in a fun-filled collection of Mickey Mouse Clubhouse latest episodes that celebrate themes of friendship, teamwork, sharing and problem solving. Mickey Mouse Clubhouse: Minnie’s Masquerade is the perfect gift to dress-up your Valentine’s Day, available on Disney DVD February 8 from Walt Disney Studios Home Entertainment.

This latest release features four playful Minnie-themed adventures previously seen on the Mickey Mouse Clubhouse TV show, a never-before-seen episode, and a free paper mask with festive embellishments that kids can personalize. And as a special option for consumers, Disney has packaged a version of the DVD to include the exclusive Mickey Mote – a child-friendly handheld remote control, shaped like Mickey ears, that takes children’s viewing experience to a whole new level of play. The DVD + Mickey Mote Play Set is the ultimate value for moms and equally fun and engaging for kids! The Mickey Mote uses infrared wireless technology and may not be compatible with all devices.

Mickey Mouse Clubhouse: Minnie’s Masquerade starring Disney’s Fab Five — Minnie, Mickey, Donald, Goofy and Daisy – takes viewers on an all new adventure as they dress-up in their favorite costumes for Minnie’s Masquerade Ball. In this episode, Minnie needs some help getting everything ready for her party including making royal crowns for their costumes, searching for Sir Goofalot’s lost shoe, stringing up paper lanterns and much, much more. At the ball, Professor Von Drake hosts the great Clubhouse Costume Show and gives out prize ribbons to all the friends who have dressed up in some funny and fancy costumes. All it takes is a heaping helping of imagination…and the right Mouseketools.

About Disney’s Exclusive Mickey Mote:
Disney’s Mickey Mote works with any Disney Preschool DVD that includes the Discovery Mode™ feature – an interactive “Watch & Play” feature on the DVD. All parents have to do is program the remote control – there’s an easy and quick set-up guide in each DVD- and select the Discovery Mode feature on the menu screen. Within minutes, kids will be easily responding to questions, throughout the story, about scenes they just watched by pressing one of four color-coded buttons on the device — a yellow star, green circle, orange triangle or blue square – to click in their responses. Discovery Mode features include two levels of play, which provides more challenging questions as the child grows.

The Mickey Mote can be used with any Disney Preschool DVD that includes the Discovery Mode feature. To date there are more than 11 titles that can be used with the remote control, just take a look at the back of the package to make sure."

Family Time Factor:  Mostly enjoyed by kids 8 and under, but more geared towards toddlers and preschoolers.  (Although my preschooler snubbed her nose at it.)

MOTR Grade: B+

Mickey Mouse Clubhouse: Minnie's Masquerade is now available on DVD!!!

Disney Movie Rewards currently has a $5 off coupon for the Mickey Mote and DVD Play Set!

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Post Holiday Wants

So now that the holidays are over, I have no reason to slack off.  Okay, maybe I do, but why is the holiday season so dang hectic?  Normally I don't expect anything for the holidays except money.  Cold hard cash pays the bills and that's what I want.  This year, though, I wanted a pogo stick.  And I got it.  I'm in love with it.

I love having this blog and the fun things that I get to review.  One of my favorite companies to blog for is CSN.  I know you've heard of them because you are on the internet and they are all over the web.  You go to one of their 200+ websites and you can get everything from high heeled shoes (like I have before) to a laptop messenger bag to a copper pot and everything in between.

I will be doing an upcoming review for them again, but have yet to decide what I will review.  Now that Christmas is over, it's more about what people didn't get and what they want to get for themselves.  With my upcoming move, I'm sure I will think of a million things I need.

Anyway, look for my upcoming review, but in the meantime- was there anything you didn't get over the holidays that you really were hoping for?